Don’t Be This Kind of Co-Founder
Last July I left my job at a high growth startup and decided I needed to take some time to deal with burnout and made the active decision not to start applying for work immediately. When I made that initial announcement, I had about 30 offers to interview in my inbox and a number of co-founders/CEOs/CTOs reach out to speak directly with me. Because I knew that this initial excitement might not persist, I decided to jump on calls with some of the more promising leads.
To start, I love the startup world. I love how much everyone loves the work they do. I love how everyone is 100% in on their business — I have never been in another industry quite like it. But I noticed very quickly that many of the senior staff that was calling on me were eager to talk about their companies, themselves, and quite often asked nothing of me and didn’t take any time to consider me as a person.
On 4 separate occasions I had a co-founder talk at me for over an hour without me saying more than ‘yes’ and ‘no’ a few times. What dumbfounded me more than anything was that after these multi-hour lectures I was told that I has interviewed amazingly and would be going onto the next round of interviews — something that none of the founders had even bothered to ask if I was interested in. While this is flattering, the interview process to become a developer is very time consuming and requires multiple multi-hour interviews, so even starting the process should be done only with careful consideration.
One co-founder went so far as to tell me that he pretty much only wanted to hire me because I was a female — nothing to do with my skill or career ambition. Although diversity and inclusion is important, no one wants to hear that they are hired for something out of their control. I have my own aspirations, career goals, work ethic, and I wan to work for a company that compliments my strengths and weaknesses.
It wasn’t until a few months later while speaking to a Senior Director at another tech startup that I was able to reflect on all of the previous conversations that I had until this point. This was my first conversation with a female in a senior position, and I don’t think that it is a coincidence that this was the first time I has been asked about myself, my goals, or my approach to software development. The conversation went over an hour mark and we were able to really learn about each other and it was obvious to me that this was definitely a company worth working for. For the first time in a long time, I felt listened to and valued, even before the official interview process had began.
This is really a long-winded rant hidden in an article mask, but I have felt an increasing need to put this into words. I have been interviewing with companies and having coffees with employees at all levels within their organization for the past few months and this is my #1 red flag. Finding a new role shouldn’t be black and white — you should want to work for a company as much as a company wants you to work for them. You need to understand each other’s needs and strengths as much as possible before making the big commitment of accepting a job. Prospective employees want to be heard and understood before moving forward in a lengthy and time-consuming process.
